TV shows I love for kids.. Yea, I said it.

I know, I know. You are probably thinking, as a nanny, I shouldn’t recommend young children watching television but channels like PBS have found an art form for  children's cartoons. Certain shows seem to lock in children of particular ages. There’s a science to it. Having been exposed to a ton of different cartoons, I have a few favorites that have prove to give the children I nanny a sense of fun in learning and imagination. Here are some of my favorites for ages 2-6:

Curious George

First of all, it’s a classic. But more importantly they don’t dumb this show down. This show has single handedly made Lily a fan of the doctors’ office, as well as parks, measuring, and hopscotch. After coming home from her very exciting doctor’s appointments she loves to show of her “vaccination”. (If you’ve never heard a 2-3 year old say vaccination, it’s pretty adorable.) After each series of episodes, PBS shows Arts & Crafts options, or even scientific projects done in classrooms that you can do at home.

Secondly, I love George because outside of the things is teaches Lily and challenges her to do; it translates into a never-ending book series. Lily loves going to the library and finding which George books are currently available. She’ll sit quietly and flip through the pages for hours. This is a television show that motivates her to do everything from cooking to playing to reading. I’m sold.

Super Why!

This shows teaches everything from manners to reading. Two things I stress. Each episode starts with a brief storyline in which one of the characters needs to figure out a solution. To find the solution they meet up with their friends and pick a fairytale or book in which they think they will find the answer. Then a short sentence is placed on a screen and they go through multiple adventures to find the letters that fill in the sentence. (Think Wheel of Fortune.) The sentences are usually things like “Say Please”, “Plan Ahead”, “Clean Your Room”, and “Don’t Lie”.

 

Phineas and Ferb

This one if for children a little bit older but I became a quick fan of this as a morning replacement for SpongeBob (which I hate for kids). I give Catherine 15-20 minutes of TV time in the morning before school as a way to ease in to talking to people; neither of us are morning people and this time has proved to solve a lot of issues.

Phineas and Ferb are imaginative, adventure seeking step-brothers on summer vacation, constantly doing experiments or just something outrageous to drive their sister, Candace, crazy. Well, they don’t do it for that reason really but Candace is constantly trying to bust them and she never can. This cartoon pushes the imagination. It allows for kids to be inspired by the “What If’s” in life and it’s fun. They also have my favorite theme song.

Sid the Science Kid

This is more one of Lily’s favorite than mine but I don’t knock it. This show is full of music and science. Lily has learned so much from their science lab and circle time. They discuss everything from the changes in the weather, to measuring, to insects.

Hello, My name is Lily and I’m an Apple-Juice-aholic.

Lily is hitting “The Terrible Three’s” in two weeks. (Yes, “The Terrible Three’s”. I don’t believe that 2 is a terrible age. 3 is much, much worse because they can speak and have full opinions.) She’s is now clever, verbal, and able. It’s awful. She knows how to throw a fit, how to move chairs to climb on counters, how to undo most baby locks, and mainly how to get her way. Lately, it all comes down to those damn Juice Boxes.

See, Lily loves Apple Juice more than, probably, anything in the world. She begs for it several times a day. “KiKi, I NEEEEEEDD Apple Juice!!! III NEEED it!” But not just any Apple Juice. No. Apple Juice Boxes. If it comes in any other form she isn’t having it and a full on meltdown breaks out. I don’t stand for this business. The rule is 1 A.J. box a day, if you were a good girl. If we are out of boxes, tough cookies munchkin. But Lily’s dad is pretty typical. He can’t stand the meltdowns. And after Lily refuses breakfast once or twice, usually demanding “mushrooms” (aka marshmallows), he caves and offers up the A.J. box at 9:30am leaving us no bribes to use later in the day. I don’t know how I feel about it or how I’m allowed to respond. Having been with them for 2 years, I have the urge to turn around and say “Seriously?! You can’t enable her and offer up all the goods every time she cries or she’ll never stop. Plus, we need to save our amo for later in the day.” But instead I stay silent. And so does Lily’s mom.

How do you handle the A.J. addiction?

Adventures in Potty Training...

Lily is potty training. Or maybe I'm the one learning something new. We all assumed this would be easy. She gets every other concept. She has full conversations, memories, and can give me directions to her favorite places. How is potty training a concept she wont latch on to? Maybe she is just refusing?

We have tried everything. The weekends in., the surprises for successes, the DVDs, the pull ups, and even sitting on the Elmo potty for an hour at a time. We rarely have success, she doesn't even seem to notice when she pees herself, and she refuses to talk about it.

She isn’t connecting the idea of actually going potty to the prize. She’ll sit on it, wipe, flush nothing, and say its time for a prize. She loves diapers and hates diapers changes. She’ll be 3 next month. I’m at a loss. I’ve been googling all morning and her mother has read every book and article.

Today, I will actually venture out into the world with her in "Big Girl Pants".  Maybe she'll take note of an accident if it happens around strangers.

Who has ideas?

5 Things I learned... From HelloGiggles.com!

I found this wonderful article on HelloGiggles.com (a blog I'm newly obsessed with) and I wanted to share it with you! 

5 things I learned about being a Mom, from Peg Bundy

by Danielle Hampton

Married With Children was one of those shows that my Mom wouldn’t let me watch growing up, alongside The Simpsons and Beavis and Butthead. But sorry Mom, a girl wants what a girl can’t have, and over those years living at home I secretly watched hundreds of episodes, amassing a veritable vault of Bundy knowledge that can be applied to all aspects of life. And to this day, I still get a little thrill when I successfully make it through an entire episode of Married With Children without flipping quickly to PBS when someone walks into the room.

If we’re going on style and attitude, Peg Bundy may be the best television Mom of all time, and I (half-jokingly) can credit some of my Mom knowledge to this impeccably dressed, immeasurably funny woman. In future columns I’ll be discussing the legacies of many other favorite television mamas, but today, it’s all about Peggy.
So, here are 5 things I learned about being a Mom, from Peg Bundy.

1. You have to look good, to feel good. High heels, huge hair, and tight pants worked for Peggy, and they work for me too. On days when I feel like I got run over by a two-ton truck and need about seven more hours of sleep, if I just put a little time in with the blush brush or curling iron, I feel like a million bucks. Even if I’m just hanging out at home with my son, a little red lipstick can go a long way.  And seriously, I’m sure you fellow mamas can relate- it’s so easy to fall into a rut, and taking a couple of minutes to feel beautiful always puts a little pep in my step.
2. A little indulgence never hurt anyone. Now, I’m not advocating smoking here (I think it’s disgusting), but Peg knew what worked for her- and let herself really enjoy it!  For me, it’s dark chocolate and the occasional ice cream cone. They keep me going. At the end of a long day, once my son has gone to bed, curling up on the couch with a delicious chunk (okay, entire bar) of dark chocolate with sea salt is my own little slice of heaven. For Peg, it was cigarettes for a while, always shoes, a new tube of lipstick- really anything and everything her heart desired. Peg always put Peg first, and while that isn’t really my style, I do like to put me first every once in a while. Peg reminds me to do this.
3. Keep your girlfriends close. Peg and Marcy may have had their squabbles, but Peggy knew that when life got tough with the ever-grumpy, sex-refusing, wallet-closing, insult-throwing Al, Marcy would be there for her. Their friendship got them through a lot, and with me it’s no different. Some days you just need your girlfriends, whether it be a long phone conversation full of laughter, or a fun night out on the town. We all need a little Marcy D’Arcy in our lives.
4. It’s never as bad as it seems. Peg always takes everything in stride. Seriously. From Kelly’s escapades with every guy in town, to Bud’s incessant whining, to Al’s crass remarks, Peg knew when to shrug it off (and go shopping!).  On days when she felt like she couldn’t get ahead, Peg always managed to come out on top and realize that it could definitely be worse (but not much worse).  Being a Mom and wife could get tough at times, but Peggy never got down for too long, and truly realized that it wasn’t ever as bad as it seems. Sometimes when I’m feeling not-so-happy I need to remember this. Whatever sad or bad mood I’m in, it would be good to take a look at the way Peg lives her life (some of it at least) and realize that this too shall pass.
5. Laughter is always the best medicine. Life in the Bundy household may be a bit more vulgar/extreme/ridiculous than most, but the common thread is laughter. Sure, my husband Hank doesn’t make jokes about not being about to distinguish my chest from my stomach or constantly put me down for not working outside the home, but we do joke a lot. Laughter abounds in our house, and even when life seem a little dismal or when things aren’t the best, we always seem to find the humor in situations. This has helped us get through many hard times, and being able to rely on the other to make us laugh is the best. My husband is definitely no Al, but we’ve absolutely taken a page out of the Bundy book in terms of infusing humor into our day-to-day.

With that said, what television Moms do you love?  I’ve been known to do a little admiring of Claire Huxtable, and who can forget Vicki’s Mom, Mrs. Lawson, of Small Wonder fame? (She always treated V. like a real girl).

So do tell, who are your fave T.V. mamas? I’m looking forward to discussing more of them, from Roseanne Conner to Mona Robinson (points if you know who that is!).

Danielle Hampton is a high school English teacher turned stay-at-home Mom, living in Arizona. She blogs daily at Sometimes Sweet and tweets too much via @danihampton. Come say hello!

** Click title for direct link. :)

Ouch.

 

In first grade, I was used as an example for “what happens when you don’t wear sunscreen”. I’m not sure if it was the blisters or the embarrassment but I called home sick right way. Before you judge my parents for not applying sunscreen I would like to stop you. They were RELIGIOUS about putting sunscreen on my extremely fair skin. But I had spent the day before at the next-door neighbors, who were lucky if they put sunscreen on once through out the day. I came home looking like a lobster. And even my principle made jokes about my mother boiling me in a pot the next day. It was bad.

20–ish years later I wear sunscreen everyday but I have my moments when I think I’m some hidden golden goddess, like my sister, and I decide to only wear sunscreen on my face. Like yesterday.  Luckily I flip-flopped a lot and only got red in a few places during my 45 minute endeavor. My boyfriend stayed on his back the whole time and his stomach now resembles a tomato. This got me thinking about my younger days. And  home remedies. Especially ones’ safe for children.

In the Florida Keys, my dad used to break open an aloe plant and rub it on me but that isn’t exactly applicable in other parts of the country. So here are the remedies I’ve gathered.

• Vinegar seems to be a common thread. You can rise off and pat you or your child’s body dry and then put vinegar in a spray bottle, with or without cool water to lighten it up. The vinegar relieves the sting of the sunburn and helps with the inflammation.
• Plain or even chamomile tea bags come in handy as well. Steep a few bags, cool them off in the fridge, and then you can either spray the ice tea on the burn, apply a tea-soaked cool towel, or even step into a tea bath. For children I would suggest the spray bottle or the bathtub. The less you have to touch the skin the better!
• Cool washcloths soaked with milk. Rinse off within an hour. Otherwise the milk will start to smell a little funky. (I just saw this method used on Tabitha’s Salon Takeover after a “beautician” burned the bejeezus out of a lady’s eyebrows. It seems soothing.)
• Vitamin E is also helpful! I have the liquid version in our home. So we both took a few drops of it to helps the skin heal. I use Nature’s Bounty, which actually taste good. It has a slight lemon flavor to it. You can mix it with water or even juice if your child won’t allow you to drop it in their mouth directly. 
• This isn’t an exactly “natural” solution but I use Neosporin Wound Cleanser for Kids on my burns and wounds. There is no sting involved, which makes cleaning out wounds and burns easier for everyone involved, regardless of age.

Leave it to Martha...

Leave it to Martha Stewart to come up with not 1 but 28 summer craft ideas for kids!

Here's the link :)

Bottle Fairy!!

Lily is turning 3 next month, and while doctors have told us she probably should have ditched the bottle a while ago, we pick our battles. She only has a bottle 3 times a day; one when she wakes up, one at nap time, and one before bed. It’s made life simpler for a while but she obviously can’t be on the bottle forever. So! her mother has come us with a genius plan.

Enter: Bottle Fairy!

On Friday night, Lily will have her last bottle of milk. She will clean it and place it in a box with all of her other bottles, and go to bed. When she wakes up in the morning, the bottles will be gone and a prize will be left in their place.

It’s similar to the tooth fairy (or Santa) and helps ease the pain of loosing her dear bottles. Hopefully, it will go swimmingly. I’m sure I’ll hear “Kiki, I need a booootttle” a few more times but I have high hopes for this fairy and her career.  

* Apparently Lily's mom did not invent the Bottle Fairy, BUT I still think it's genius!

Home is Where ever I'm with you...

This is the type of video that not only makes us nod our head while googling the song, but also gives us an amazing look at parenting. This is a newly single dad of two little girls. He sings with her every night as a means to ease the pain of divorce for his child while building and bond and giving her tools and passion. On Ellen he said “his house has four guidelines: Family, Community, Art, and Music.” I can’t think of a better way to raise a child. I’m so grateful that my friend shared this video with me. I hope you pass it on.

Click here to learn more about Jorge and Alexa.

Click here to see more videos of them.

And here to hear the original song!

Lily Starts School Today...

Lily started school today. As a nanny, you may not think this bothers me. You may even think I would come to work and say “Less work for me. Only one baby.” But instead my heart sank and I almost cried. I started with Lily when she was teetering around and now she’s at Mommy’s Morning Out with her elmo backpack and a whole group of new friends. She is becoming a big kid. I can’t even imagine how hard this is for actual parents. I can’t wait to hear about her day at school. I hope she has a blast. That’s all.

Amazing Pictures.

My friend sent me an email this morning of ridiculous parenting pictures. Here are some of my absolute favorites.

Thanks, Dude.

I’m a bad, bad blogger. I didn’t post anything for Father’s Day. I’m Sorry. I’m sure the tie-shaped-cards found their way. I hope. Any who, I just wanted to take a moment and thank everyone who stops by NannyKiki. There are readers in over 10 countries!! I am beyond myself. I promise more posts ASAP.

Again, Thank you!!!!

Sunscreen + Pig tails = Summer fun!

It’s summertime! And Lily finally has enough hair for pig tails! The only problem with this, is sunburns. Up until recently I thought she would either have to wear a hat or have greasy sunscreeny hair. Or no pig tails. Her mother and I found a product from Baby Blanket at the store. (They sell a scalp sunscreen that is 45+.) But I, personally, strongly dislike it. It must have been made for bald babies. The pump is pointless because it comes out heavy anyway.  And it is extremely greasy. But after some experimenting I found that, the sunscreen with the longest name, Banana Boat® UltraMist® Sport Performance™ Clear Spray Sunscreen was the best I could find. While it slightly resembles hairspray, it’s clear and non-greasy. It leaves the hair looking normal and protects those sweet potatoes heads. Now Lily is free to have all kinds of “princess hair” through out the summer. 

*After posting this I realized that younger children may still need "baby sunscreen". Here is another option for sensitive skin. Coppertone WaterbBabies Sunscreen Lotion SPF 50 and remember, doctors don't recommend sunscreen or sun for babies under the age of 6 months! :)

WubbaNub Wonders

WubbaNub Infant Toy Pacifier is brilliant. Or at least it sounds brilliant. Today, over coffee, I was talking to my friend Haley. She is a nanny as well and we love to meet up with the kids when we can. A nanny date. I had Dolly with me and I was telling Haley how she can’t seem to hold the pacifier. She wants it but her tongue automatically kicks it out of her mouth. Haley told me that one of her family members had used this product and loved it. It looks perfect! Dolly will be able to hold the animal while soothing herself with the pacifier. You can choose from a large variety of animals. I will be telling Dolly’s mom about it ASAP, but wanted to make sure I shared the information with you!

Have any of you used a WubbaNub before?


 **I had some responses concerning the possible long-term issues with WubbaNubs. Some people are against pacifiers in general. Both the dependence on something that externally soothes and the future orthodontic worries are sound arguments. Or even the possibility that the child may become attached and you now have a toddler with a toy hanging out of its mouth. I believe, like most things, it’s a personal choice. WubbaNubs, or pacifiers in general, may not be for you but I wanted to post them just in case the readers that love pacifiers were looking for options. Thank you so much for your feedback! The more this blog becomes interactive the better! It takes a village… or world wide web community.

No Pictures Please!

Recently, my friends baptized their baby boy. The father’s side of the family lives in New York and naturally; most of his family had not seen the baby yet. They took this opportunity to fly the 3,000-and-some miles to see Charles’ 4 moths old. He is cute. Damn cute. Because of the churches schedule the Baptism was at 2pm. I thought that this may be a rough time for the 4-month-old given that it is directly in the middle of prime napping time... I walked into this worried. But its one day. How bad could it be?

Bad.

There may have been 30 family members. The baby was being passed around, much to the mother’s dismay, and photos were constant. The baby HATED the flashes but the family continued. It’s just a crying baby and this moment won’t happen again. I get it. But soon the baby started to turn bright red on his arms and legs. So bad, some assumed that he was sun burned. I wondered how a baby could be so sun burned but I figure it was best to stay out of the way. I’ll see the family again soon and this is more of a family moment. Afterward, everyone harped on the mother, begging her to wake the baby so they could see him. She was completely overwhelmed and trying to be a people-pleaser but knew the baby hated every minute. After a while she pried him out of the Mother-in-laws arms. Charles caught on and whisked her and the baby up stairs.

A few days later, Jeff came home from work and said that Charles and his wife had to take the baby to the emergency room the day after the Baptism. He had broken out in a rash and hives of some sort. After every test in the book, and stressing the parents out beyond belief, the doctors gave Charles a topical cream and said the baby was just over whelmed. It went away in a few days and everything was fine but it really made me more aware of these situations. Babies will tell us how they feel.  Their bodies are tiny and they are overwhelmed easily. And mothers do know best! I wanted to share this just so that everyone hears a story like this and keeps in it the back of their mind and maybe even help some mothers feel more confident in their gut instincts.

Friday Night with the Girls

It’s been a while since I just told a funny story so I thought I’d share my Friday night with you guys.

 

I have been annoying ill for the last 6-8 weeks on and off. But Thursday through Sunday was exceptionally rough for me. I had promised Lily and Dolly’s parents that I would baby-sit for them all day Friday since their friends were in town. So from 9am until midnight I was there as promised. Coughing my brains out. So by the time their friends showed up at 6pm I was ready to get out of the house. I, in my disillusioned mind, asked to take the girls out for dinner. Lily is almost 3 and Dolly is 4 months. Lily kept saying she wanted to go to “The Dolphin” so her father gave me directions. After prying Lily away from every toy in the house we were finally in the car and on our way. We pulled up to “The Dolphin” which is actually the Bluewater Grill, a nice restaurant on the water in the South Bay. I almost choked. Me and 2 babies, at nice restaurant, during feeding time. Dear Lord. As I was getting the girls out of the car, my favorite work jeans split. Ok. Well, that seems about right. I called my boyfriend and begged him to drive as fast as humanly possible to the restaurant with jeans and save me. We had a 3o minute wait and by the time he got there we were all at our ends. Dolly had been given her bottle but had no desire to take her nap and Lily was hungry and seriously tempted by the elevator in the corner. After a quick change we were led to our table. Waitresses crowded around, telling us how beautiful "our" babies were asking questions like, “What’s their sign?” J had no idea what to do with himself. He was nervous and shocked by the amount of attention two pretty little girls can get. Literal crowds were forming as we ordered as quickly as possible and shuffled the girls back and forth, keeping the peace. And then my favorite onlooker came. The hostess came up to tell us that her brother was sitting near by with his two little boys that she was now marrying our girls off to. J was floored. Why in the world do people feel so comfortable talking to people with babies?? I had to explain to him that it’s always better to nod and smile. (See The Awkwardness) And then in the middle of our dinner the sister-in-law actually came over to meet our two little babies to see who her future daughters would be. We smiled and made light conversation. All the while realizing this night was the best form of birth control either one of us could have brought to the table. After our meal, J helped me put Lily in the car as I secured an exhausted Dolly. I kissed him goodbye and we all went on our way. The girls were in PJs and asleep within 15 minutes of getting home. All in all the night was a success and eventually J and I would love to have healthy pretty little girls of our own… but for now... we’re good.

Tiger Mom.. I'm with you.

What I’m about to say may be taken wrong, but before everyone clicks the X at the top of your screen, have patience and hear me out.

I was catching up on my Real Time with Bill Maher episodes this weekend, and I saw a brief but enlightening interview with Tiger Momma Amy Chua. I have only heard horrible things about her. Things like she calls her children garbage. Which is a lie. In fact, Kevin’s mom released a fiction novel into the Asian community at the same time that the Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom was released. Majority of her press revolved around Amy Chua questions in which she hated and ran from. In my opinion she probably would have sold more books if she answered those questions and maybe it was even a cosmic way of the world telling her she needed to read that book.  ANYWAYS… There is something to be said about her outlook on raising a child. I’m not saying it’s “right” or the “only way” but I’m saying that I agree with her in the aspect that children of this generation seem to have an unwarranted amount of self-confidence and self-esteem. They are beyond proud of themselves before they even accomplish something. That is assuming they actually find it necessary to accomplish something at all. Achievement needs to come before self-esteem. I’m not sure if it’s the guilt of a dual working parent situation or if it’s just people afraid of their kids crying but it’s a freaking mess. Yes, a FREAKING MESS! Her point was eloquently put when she said something along the lines of “you can’t play Mozart if you can’t play in tune”. There has to be a balance between letting your children be creative and “who they are meant to be” and be disciplined. They have to learn respect, manners, and work ethic. Otherwise what kind of world will we have in 30 years? Not one that I want to live in.

As you all may know, I spend my mornings with a 5 year old, and every day before 8am I “hate” at least 4-5 things. Today I couldn’t even bare to speak in the child’s home because I was nauseated by how the mother was allowing her daughter to treat me. When she finally got to school she was rude to the teacher, who was trying to be as nice as possible. I took Catherine aside and said “Look, that was mean. You can’t ignore people. If you want to be known as the sweet, nice, polite girl you actually have to act sweet, nice, and polite. You can’t ignore people and be rude.” I told her to spend the day working on saying please, thank you, and no thank you and to think about treating people the way she wants to be treated. I really wanted to walk out of the job and never ever come back. In fact even my beloved Lily will say "Look KiKi! I'm so good at this! I'm so good!" all day regardless of what she is doing or how she is doing it.

My mother used to say things like “I love you but that doesn’t mean I have to like you.” and “If you don’t like me it means I’m doing my job.” I HATED her for those comments but now I see how right she is. I’m picking up a copy of Amy Chua’s book this week.

I included the interview below in case any of you are curious. ☺

Mabel's Labels

I was watching The View today and they did a little segment on what’s hot for the summer. One of the things caught my attention: Mabel’s Labels. Mabel’s Labels sells personalized wristbands that look similar to hospital bracelets or bar bands (What?! They do!).  They website lists several other types of labels available, as well. But the wristbands are water proof and can be designed to list allergies, phone numbers, and more. These are great for field trips, beach days, days at Disney World, and summer camp. I highly recommend you check it out!

Oh Hay Stranger!

I've come to realize that children have a sixth sense. They can spot a child lover a mile away. Erasing all normal fears and limitations.


This weekend my sister was in town. She was shocked by the car seats in the back of my Ford Escape. She had heard they were there but I guess it's different when you actually see a booster seat and a car seat in the back of your single little sisters car. But that was nothing compared to lunch in Malibu. Out of nowhere a little boy, Anthony (probably 21 months old), decided that we should be best friends. He later decided that we should share my chair. I humored the little boy, saying hello and hi repeatedly, but my sister made a cardinal mistake when she actually told the Malibu Mom that I was a nanny. The mom completely stopped even calling out the little boys name. So, after practicing colors and I taught him how to rip open a packet of sugar. Bon Voyage!

P.S. My sister told me I was wrong to show him how sugar comes out of a sugar packet but I have no regrets.

Sh*t My Kids Ruined . Com

http://shitmykidsruined.com/

I can not get enough of this site. So, I thought I would share. Be prepared to waste at least a solid hour clicking through photos of disasters children have left behind.

Favorite Things - Video Baby Monitor

When I first posted a few of my favorite things I asked for people to let me in on their must haves. I received responses with a few amazing products. The Sleep Sheep is one of my favorites but the product that I should have listed all along was the video baby monitor! This invention has saved so many mothers and nannies from opening the door at the wrong moment and ruining the likes of naptime. Of course we want to be able to see that everything is ok. Just hearing snoring or nothing at all makes us stand with the monitor up to our ear like a telephone and has lost parents hours of sleep. Quiet Sounds has a monitor available for $139. It’s really all you need, but it you are tech savvy or maybe overprotective and want a TV screen sized image of your baby sleeping those are available as well. Finally, spy gear used for a practical purpose! I suggest buying a video baby monitor at a well-known chain, such as Target. This way if it has any glitches you can have the comfort of amazing customer service.

The Awkwardness...

 

It happens all the time; people on the street, and even in gymboree,  think that I’m a young mother. I’m a small white girl in my mid-twenties walking around a nice neighborhood with a 2-year-old matching baby. We both have brown hair and green eyes so naturally people assume that I am Lily’s mother. But it’s not limited to Lily; I had the same conversations while with Kevin, an Asian baby. I think the main thing is that people have a stereotype of what a nanny looks like and frankly I’m not it. So, what do I do in these awkward moments? Well, usually I just go with it. 

If the person is someone you are only going to see for a few minutes, some times it’s not worth correcting them and then being asked your life story or making them feel awkward. Obviously, it would be creepy to take on a child as my own in some pretend world but when it comes to a grandmother at the playground talking about how she is so glad to see a mom at the play ground when all she normally sees is “day workers”… it’s better to smile and nod.

Show Me The Money

Working as a part-time nanny poses many hurdles. I would argue that the number one hurdle revolves around money.  For some unknown reason, at least to me, parents that work with “part-time” nannies are always trying to pull a fast one; whether they are aware of it or not. Here is my personal example.

I have been working with Lily’s family for over a year and a half now. When I met them Lily was about 13 months old and just learning to run around. I see them 3 days a week, every week, and have done numerous overnights with Lily. In all of this time, I have never been offered a raise. Yes, I did receive a little extra money for Christmas both years and a Starbucks gift card on my birthday but no raise. I never really expected one until baby number two came along.

Last summer, I started to feel like something was up. I mentioned the awkwardness and was told they loved me and everything was fine. A few weeks later, infant socks were on the counter and then one day a sonogram was floating around. I had a full on panic attack. I thought maybe they weren't telling me because they were thinking of firing me, or maybe they just wanted to wait until she was past the first trimester. I’ve never had a child; I don’t know how this “I’m having a baby!” thing works?! They decided to finally tell me in August when Lily’s mom was visibly 6 months pregnant . Mainly because family was coming in town for Lily’s birthday and they knew the cat would crawl out of the bag. I acted surprised.

You would think that the “we’re having another baby for you to watch” money conversation would happen soon after that, but no. It finally happened 2 weeks ago after I had watched both babies together and was not paid for it. I brought it up to Lily’s mother and she said they were trying to figure it out. I was patient. They finally decided on a $2 raise for the hours that I had both children. I basically said I thought that was ridiculous in the nicest way possible. and then came home and cried to my boyfriend. (Super mature, I know.) I’m scheduled to watch both kids next week… I really have no idea what I will be paid.

Here’s the truth: I’m AWFUL with money conversations. I avoid them all the time. My advice is to have these conversations with all of the “what if’s” when you first get started. Possibly avoiding all of the nonsense that I am currently caught in the middle of.

I love this family dearly but I feel a lack of respect at the end of the day. I have spent countless hours with Lily. I introduced Lily to her baby sister. We have recently put a car seat in my car for her and added chores into my routine. In any profession you would expect some form of a raise within a year and a half, especially if the work load doubles. Parents working with part-time nannies tend to play on the guilt of how expensive everything else is. But you must be strong!!

The moral of the story comes down to advice from You’ve Got Mail, or The Godfather depending on whom you are talking to: IT’S NOT PERSONAL IT’S BUSINESS!

So, take it to the mattresses. Get down to business. Be bold. But playing nice with these situations never gets you very far. Trust me.
 

*And for the parents out there, try to do the math. Put yourself in your nannies shoes or at least ask yourself how much your peace of mind is worth.

Ten Things...

 Be The Best Nanny  released a list of the top ten things your nanny will never tell you.

I decided to respond.


1. Nannies are not your maid.

To a certain extent, nannies feel the responsibility/want to clean up around the areas the child has destroyed but no, we're not maids. This is not the Real Housewives of Miami, we do not clean out your closet. Most of my families luck out because I'm a complete OCD neat freak when it comes to certain things but I have actually been reprimanded in the past for cleaning up. If you expect your nanny to deep clean, you need to have that conversation at the interview. Like cooking, some nannies might not be into it.

2. Nannies need a vacation.

Yes! Here's my issue. I'm "part time" with 2 families but really I see one family 5 days a week (every morning at 6:45am) and the other 3 (normally Tues, Thursday, and Friday). A vacation would be amazing and a possibly once a year paid vacation would probably bring me to tears. It’s easy for nannies to feel a responsibility to your family and not to even feel comfortable asking. Bring it up in conversation with your nanny. Care about their wellbeing... they are taking care of your prize possession.


3. Parents need to discipline your children.

I constantly wish I could say this. My most recent issue is with Lily's time outs... or lack there of. I get it. It’s hard. But when you decide to have kids you need to realize how much work goes into it. A 3 minute time out may take you 30 minutes the first few times but no kid is going to take time outs happily, that's the point. And if you expect me to discipline her 3 days a week, it won't work if you aren't doing it the other 4. Waiting too long to discipline your kids hurts the issue. Others might tell you the behavior is cute right now but let me tell you a secret: next year they’ll me taking behind your back about what a brat your kid is.

4. Nannies want a raise.

Yes, again, in the most logical and respectful ways. After a year, or even 6 months, a raise would be normal in any profession. And if you've added in another child, a raise would also make sense. I hate when parents wait until I bring it up. I'm terrible at money talk. Please just have respect and don’t make me beg for every dollar. I like to give families the illusion that I would watch their kid for free. No one wants to think their nannies are in it for the cash.

5. They see other nannies yelling at — or ignoring — other children.

I've never seen nanny abuse but I have seen nannies either take advantage of a situation or ignore a child. I see nannies regularly taking the child to the park so they can spend the day with their own kids and leave the child in their stroller for naptime causing hell for anyone who wants the kid to nap in her crib. Some nannies are amazing and some suck. I'm amazed at what people put up with from their employees.

6. That Christmas present? They hated it.

I've loved all the presents I have received. They have always been thoughtful. Except for when I got a $15 gift card for a child I was with 30 hours a week that was a living nightmare. I felt slightly under appreciated but reminded myself that I'm lucky to have a job because many don’t.

7. Your kids need more attention … from you.

Again, my parents are pretty great with their kids, for the most part. But I have come home to my boyfriend and said "I just want to yell "spend more time with your kid!!" There's one family I see randomly and they seem to have a nanny working at all times and rarely even see the children. The mother is now pregnant with a second. I'm speechless. A friend of mind is going back and forth on getting a nanny soon for the newborn or being a stay at home mom. I told the father that you have to be ok with knowing that someone else will see all the firsts. If I were their nanny I would lie, or neglect to divulge information, when I thought it was the first. I like parents to experience that rather than coming home and being like “darn, I missed it.”

8. Your kid has a developmental problem.

Yikes. Been here; A few times. It’s very awkward. Definitely not my place to say a word but I usually try to fit it in politely. Even when asked I usually dance around it and recommend seeing a pro.

9. It is not OK when you don't pay on time.

Unless I'm asked ahead of time, this pisses me off. For obvious reasons.

10. Nannies want to be treated with respect.

It’s ridiculous that this is even on the list. But I guess this includes: Sometimes we are uncomfortable. There is a difference between being casual or even friends with your nanny and making them uncomfortable. I have a dad that is recently making me VERY uncomfortable by walking around with no shirt on and constantly standing too close to me. I'm your 25 year old female nanny... it's weird... back off.

I was googling and I found a few sites that covered more NANNY NEVER TELLS... Reader's Digest has a great one!

Lily needs a nap.

Lily can usually do no wrong in my eyes. Yes, she pooped in a kiddie pool and made for a great laugh but I absolutely love watching her grow up. But she has definitely hits her “Terrible Two’s” or maybe it’s sleep deprivation. She recently got a “big girl bed” which caused for a lot of excitement and a lot of change. Which a new baby at home, Lily’s mother has been incapable of getting Lily to nap during the day. In the beginning of the big girl bed the process could take up to 2 hours unless you timed the walk in the stroller perfectly. I have recently been able to get Lily down for her nap within 15 minutes by calling it ‘quiet time’ but now naps only happen when I am there. Which means after a weekend of not napping, coming in on Tuesday can be rough. I’m not exactly sure how this goes but I personally and not ready for Lily’s naps to be completely gone. She’s only 30 months old. It can’t be ok for her to be awake for 12-13 hours straight. Because of the lack of naps with are now experiencing throwing, crying for no reason, and moodiness. Plus, she ends up so tired she falls asleep in the stroller and then wrecks naps and moods for the entire day. It doesn’t feel like my place to tell the mom that naps are necessary but Lily with out them is kind of a hot mess. What do you think?

The Swing

 

It’s been a while since I’ve mentioned some of my favorite baby products. I’m positive there are a million gizmos out there that mothers and nannies around the globe shutter to think of what it was like before their existence; in the same manor teenagers imagine the world before smart phones. 

Meet Fisher-Price’s Nature’s Touch Cradle Swing. There are several versions out there and I imagine they are all God sent. Let’s face it, newborns don’t know how to settle themselves and sometimes we run out of ideas and our arms simply get exhausted, holding a pacifier in their mouth is awkward and doesn’t always work, but the gentle sway of this swing mixed with the options of nature noises or light piano really does the trick. I’m saying this works most of the time. It’s not a get out of jail free card but it helps. We have been using this with Lily’s new baby sister in cohorts with the vibrating bouncy chair and it makes us all very happy.

If you have any favorite products, let me know! I'd love to give the opportunity for every one to share.

JewelMint

Most women don't have time to shop. But that doesn't mean we don't miss it. Sometimes a great piece of jewerly is exactly what a mom, nanny, or woman in general needs to feel that extra sparkle in her day. Me personally, I'm on a budget, BUT I have found amazing ways to find great pieces for low prices with out spending the day searching. Enter JewelMint. For $29.99 a month you get to pick out an amazing piece of jewelry designed by Kate Bosworth and Cher Coulter. And if there's a particular month that you don't want anything or can't afford it, just let them know by the 6th and you won't be charged for that month. AND they are honest, they aren't trying to trick you into spending money that you don't want to. They actually send you an email to remind you to decline the month around the 4th. Shipping is free and fast and they even suggest outfits for you to wear each piece with. I was nervous about the quality when I first ordered, I mean how good could it be for 30 bucks? Don't doubt it, it's perfect. This doesn't directly connect to nannying but having children, a full time job, or both leaves you very little time for you. JewelMint makes it easy.


Just wanted to share

xoxo

Mornings with Catherine: Sticks and Stones.

 

 

I'm pretty hard on Catherine. I'll be the first to admit that we clash in the morning and choosing not to be her friend during that hour is the only way to make it work. I don't always like Catherine or her behavior but I have a certain love for her. I see her every morning and feel very protective of her. I learned this pretty quickly one morning when I brought Catherine to school and witnessed the bullying that was taking place.

I wasn't in the best of moods after fighting with Catherine all morning, but when I was signing her in to before-school-care two little boys showed me that I needed to be more sensitive and realize that Catherine’s a person too and her life isn’t easy. These two little jocks-in-training started following Catherine around saying "Hey, vampire! Oh look the vampire is here.” The hairs on the back of my neck shot up. I was teased in school for being "too white" among various other things. Growing up in sun kissed Miami, FL didn’t help either.  I vividly remember going to school in 8th grade with a white shirt on and having a group of my friends publicly tease me; saying things like "Hey Candace! Why didn't you wear a shirt today?!". Did they mean to scar me for life? Probably not, but I didn't wear shorts until my last semester of college. In fact, I still shy away from them. And I've been shaving my arms since 7th grade because of the comments about how black my hair was against my white skin. I don't remember what it looks like to have hair on my arms. I probably never will.

I wanted to kill those two little boys in that instant. I didn't want to leave the school and what was even more horrifying to me was that the teacher heard this and did nothing. I tried to check myself by thinking maybe being a vampire is a good thing now with this entire Twilight craze but it wasn’t. Their tone was awful. I decided that since I'm only the nanny, I needed to talk to the mom before ripping the boys and the teacher a new one. I called Catherine's mom immediately and she said she would talk to Catherine about it and thanked me for calling. She didn’t really seem to have the same reaction as me. I was fuming all day; reliving my own experiences and wishing I could shelter Catherine from all that pain. Not to mention the haunting thoughts about how much worse it will feel when it is my own child.

Her mom texted me later that night saying that Catherine didn't seem phased by it. But in my heart I still know she is. She refuses to wear shorts, skirts, or anything without long sleeves and she went through a period of time where she was drawing vampires a lot. Both go unexplained. I guess kids are mean and it’s a harsh thing we all have to deal with. The only way to protect a child is by arming them with confidence; reminding them how beautiful and special they are. As well as making sure they aren't the one bullying.

Maybe those kids built character in both Catherine and I. Maybe we are the better people because we have those internal scars. Maybe kids won't ever be nice to each other; adults have a hard enough time. But at the end of the day we can't stay blissfully unaware of their pains. We have to remember it’s out there and be careful with the things we do and say. “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” is a fairytale. And while some may be strong enough to actually live by that, most of us have carried those thoughtless and cruel remarks with us into adulthood. Remarks that the other person may have never thought twice about.

Maybe this post wasn’t funny and won't be a favorite amongst readers, but I can’t stand by without asking everyone to think twice.

I have listed some website on bullying below.

Stop Bullying Now!

Kid's Health- Bullying and Emotions

Thank you!
C

Mornings With Catherine: Responding/Manners

Here's the thing. I am surprisingly patient towards a lot of boondogglery, mostly because I'm a difficult human being myself, especially in the morning, and I feel it's not fair to judge someone who just woke up, but when something annoys me its like nails on a chalkboard. Example? Catherine's puppy noises.

I get it. Its 7am, it's abnormally cold in her mom’s house, and she would rather not be bossed around or asked questions. But ignoring me when I talk/acting like I don't exist OR responding with pouts, wiggles, and I really don't know what to call it other than sad puppy noises makes me CRAZY.

And here is really issue number two... When Catherine's mom isn't there I'd turn off the TV and boot camp this *ish but given that her mom responds to everything as if Catherine is fatally injured, nothing gets done when she is there. It makes the entire morning process impossible and we end up cramming everything into the last 5 minutes before we leave for school.

I suppose this is more of an AM venting session but my point here is that my mother was right. Yea, I said it. Children need to learn respect. They need to learn how to respond to people, especially adults. When I was younger, we had family friends that we called the ‘Bubba Twins’; mainly because we couldn’t tell them apart. They drove my mom nuts because, even as teenagers, they responded to everything with grunting noises. I understand that the children I work with are young but the bottom line is that if people/parents continue to give kids a hall pass on manners until they are the elusive “old enough”, it’s too late.

Mornings With Catherine.

 

This morning, I walked in at 6:45am to Catherine (age: 5) chewing gum with her mouth open and playing video games. I wanted to turn around and walk out. Somehow, I resisted.

Catherine has a certain “je ne sais quoi” about her. We have early morning tiffs over how its impossible to brush your teeth without the use of water, the need to turn off SpongeBob, how a cheese stick is not breakfast, and, of course, the tedious process of getting dressed. She picks out her own clothes and the combinations are priceless.

Some days involve tears. Some hers, some mine.

When I first got the job of taking her to school every morning I was told that she may give me the cold shoulder for a while. I had no idea they meant 3 months of it. The only advice I was given by the previous nanny was that Catherine liked PB&J for breakfast. Um, Ok. Thanks.

For the first few weeks I was lucky if Catherine even spoke to me. I appreciated the silence. I'm not a morning person. I quickly learned how to handle the morning tasks militantly. See the thing about Catherine is that she is a child of divorce. This means several things. One being that they rarely tell her no, because no one wants to be the bad guy, and second being that her parents live in 2 different homes, 5 blocks from each other. We have had several crying runs to the opposite house before school because it's Spirit Day and there's nothing red at her dad's or its gymnastics day and she needs uniform: black leggings (Which is a total lie. There is no "gymnastics uniform". Well, maybe in her head there is.).


Every morning, I come home with a story. Sometimes I think she might be the devil and sometimes she's absolutely hilarious. I'll share them here. Welcome to Mornings with Catherine.
 

I cleaned... Don't be mad?

 

(Imagine this plus dirty dishes, cat hair, and crushed cheerios everywhere)

 

 

Today, I went over to nanny a little boy that I see a few times a month. I take over any hours that the full-time nanny can’t do (Sick days, overtime, etc.). I got there just when his nap had started. The home looked like a bomb went off in it. Toys everywhere, food, cups, plates, mess. Gross. Both the mom and dad were sick and they apparently hadn’t gotten around to chasing a toddler around with a broom and Lysol wipes. The dad said “Sorry about the mess. If it doesn’t bother you, you can just leave it.” Then he left to run errands while the baby and the sick mom napped up stairs. 5 minutes in I couldn’t handle it. It bothered me. I picked up a broom and Lysol and started the process. I swept, did dishes, wiped everything down, and put the toys away before he came back 45 minutes later and caught me red handed. It went like this.

HIM: “Oh you didn’t have to.”
ME: “Oh, it’s ok. I’m a compulsive cleaner.”
HIM: “Oh, well, you know all you have to do is watch Jason, right?”
Me: “Well, yes but he is sleeping.”

He sounded distressed; like I made him feel badly about his house. I was just trying to do my job and help out. It’s not like me to be on the clock and just sit and watch divorce court for 2-3 hours when there are things to be done., regardless of if its within my “responsibilities” or not.

Was I wrong to clean? When IS it wrong to clean?!? What are the responsibilities of a part-time nanny?

Diaper Genie.

Today, at our little Super Bowl party, the woman that inspired this blog thanked me for her Diaper Genie II Elite by Playtex. She said it is by far the best present she got from anyone and she couldn’t be more thankful. She called it a lifesaver. Every new family needs one. Just thought I’d share.

Happy 'You're Fired' Day

 

I originally moved out to Los Angeles in order to pursue personal dreams of mine. The road to that, lead me to the day job of being a nanny, which I LOVE. This is why I juggle several families rather than just becoming a full time nanny for one set of working parents, or shacking up and just having my own. In order to stay sane, I have strict rules to protect everyone from bad situations: I usually only work for stay at home moms who either need me to cover for them while they volunteer or run errands. You may worry that I have a limited market, but don’t you fret, in Los Angeles this is not rare. In the case of Kevin, I choose to work for a mother who was currently in the process of releasing her first novel. The father is an architect. Originally, she only needed me for 9 hours a week: 9am-12pm on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. This was perfect for me. I was completely honest in my interview process about the situations that may arise given that I am out here for acting. Auditions and bookings get very little notice and I don’t like to catch people off guard. Cathy, Kevin’s mom, was fine with this and was overwhelming supportive of my goals. Within a week, Cathy decided she needed more hours. So we upped the 9-hour schedule to a 25-hour schedule that required me to keep Kevin on Wednesdays from 9am-6pm and included Saturdays. The house in under renovations, so, we set up a mini-day-care center in my guest bedroom.  (My boyfriend was thrilled.) Cathy made me promise that I wouldn’t move or quit in the near future and made me feel slightly guilty for the finders fee my nanny agency took. I had been working with this company for over a year and never knew the agency fee existed. My boyfriend had to talk me out of offering to split the new nanny’s finders fee if I decided to leave any where between 3-12 months. I finally told her life happens and I really wish I could help but I don’t think I can.

This situation became completely overwhelming for me quickly. I was going to behaviorist specialist with Cathy and Kevin, keeping him for 12 hours straight (meaning a  minimum 15 hours work day for me since I have Catherine every morning), going to doctors appointments, adding in extra hours, occasionally getting ripped off, feeling guilty for the castings I was going on, getting the stomach flu, and all while getting kicked and scratched. 

Don’t get me wrong Kevin’s adorable and everybody loves him but I was exhausted. I tried my best to hide it. I was biting off more than I could chew while I watched the mother waste time and not take advantage of my existence and then listened to her complain about it. I remained beyond supportive of her and we had mini therapy sessions, sometimes, her and sometimes me.

One morning I walked in and Cathy awkwardly started a conversation about needing more hours. My other family had just had a new baby and I’m pretty sure I had been working for 2-3 weeks straight including a few overnights with Lily. I smiled and nodded and told her, “okay”. She told me hat she needed more consistency and with everything I’m doing and she is doing she’s going get someone to work 5 days a week 9-12, aka she’s letting me lose.  I completely understood her situation and didn’t get even remotely upset. It was Monday and she told me my last day would be Friday. Um, ok. She asked if that was enough notice and I nodded while thinking, “Do I have a choice?” The next day I came in and she informed me that she couldn’t find anyone to replace me and was wondering if I could work the following Monday as well. “Sure!” I said politely with a smile on my face. I’m a doormat. After a week of supportive texts and BBMs, from my friends, encouraging me not walk out during some of Kevin’s tantrums; Monday came around. I walked in after taking Kevin to the park as Cathy skipped out of her office. “I have a surprise for you!!” Um ok? I thought. She pulled out a cake. I’m serious. I wanted to stand there silent or say “I didn’t quit, you fired me” but it seemed like she was really excited and I suppose we had some sort of bond, so instead I put a big smile on my face and said “ Oh My Gosh! Thank you! You’re so nice!” She opened up the cake box to a Red Velvet cake that said “Thank You Candace!” on it. I put Kevin down for his nap and we sat and had a mini office party for my Happy You’re Fired Day. I over heard her on the phone bragging that it was only $18 and then she sent me home with the cake. Thanks?

I do appreciate that I meant enough to her for her to want to show some kind of appreciation but I was startled by the entire event: from hired to fired to celebrating. I’m still not sure what to think about it but I wish Cathy, Kevin, and the new nanny all the best.

Maybe I’ll miss those two.

For those who think I made this up.